Have you ever felt the weight of a shattered dream? Something that you had truly hoped for and planned on that suddenly was no more? Perhaps it was someone or something that you had put your hope in and now you sit on the floor trying to piece it all back together knowing that even if you do, it certainly won’t be the same.  

In those moments, hope feels lost and the darkness feels pretty dark. It also can feel very lonely as it’s a hard place for others to step into with you. After a very unexpected cancer diagnosis this past fall, suffering through chemotherapy all winter, and a tough surgery this spring, I now find myself sitting on that cold hard floor reaching for all the pieces. Wondering if life will ever be OK again. This is not what I at all expected, hoped for, or envisioned.  

I find myself wanting to hang my head like Jesus’s disciples did on the road to Emmaus after His death in confusion and disappointment proclaiming as they did in Luke 24:21 “Be we had hoped that He was the one who was going to redeem us.”  

At this point in the story, the disciples felt shattered as well. They had put everything on the line for Jesus, believing He was the one who would redeem them but as he died on that cross and the days followed, the darkness seemed pretty dark.  

Where are you God?  
What in the world are you doing?  
What now?

We all experience disappointment and pain. Being a follower of Jesus doesn’t protect us from struggle even though we like to think perhaps we will be the exception if only we do the right things. In all reality, we have very little control over our lives but fortunately, God does. Even when Jesus was still in the tomb, as a follower of Jesus, there is more to the story although all may seem lost in the moment. This mysterious thing we call hope still flickers even in our disillusionment and grief. Even on the long road to Emmaus.  

We all know what turn of events the Easter story takes from here. Matthew 28:5-6 “The angel said to the women, 'Do not be afraid, for I know that you are looking for Jesus, who was crucified. He is not here; he has risen, just as he said. Come and see the place where he lay.'"

Jesus is alive! He has risen! All is not lost, and those shattered pieces are restored into something even more beautiful. “The light shines in the darkness because the darkness did not overcome” (John 1:5). We know in the end, God wins and as His children, so do we.

This Easter season, my prayer is that we will be reminded of that flicker of hope that still exists in the darkness as we commit over and over again to choose Jesus even when we don’t understand Him on this side of eternity. Even in the darkness of our reality, may we choose to believe in resurrection and restoration because it’s not just a future reality to be had, but a gift for the here and now too.